Attention New Moms and Moms-To-Be: Worried About Doing All The Wrong Things For Your New Baby? Here's Everything You Need to Know From Two Of The Nation's Leading Experts
Dr. Glade Curtis and Judith Schuler, M.S., authors of "Your Baby's First Year: Week by Week" share their best advice on preparing for your baby's birth, bonding with your new baby, finding a great pediatrician and coping with infant illness and fevers.
Dr. Glade Curtis, M.D., M.P.H. and Judith Schuler, M.S., authors of "Your Baby's First Year: Week By Week" talk with Commitmentnow.com about soothing a cranky, collicky baby, taking your newborn on errands, and what every new parent should keep in their diaper bag.
Commitment: What are five ways a pregnant Mom can prepare for her baby's birth?
Dr. Glade Curtis, M.D., M.P.H. and Judith Schuler, M.S.:
• Be knowledgeable about labor and delivery, including anesthesia, various procedures, people she wants with her.
• Explore and understand the benefits of breastfeeding.
• Pack for the hospital about 4 to 5 weeks before your due date. Be sure to include things for the father-to-be and/or the labor coach.
• Prepare baby’s room about 4 weeks before baby’s birth–you never know when baby will come early!
• Buy and install in your car–have a professional help you–an approved car seat for baby.
Commitment: What makes a good pediatrician? What advice do you have for a new Mom
looking for a top-quality pediatrician? What are questions that should
be asked of a potential doctor?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: A “good pediatrician is” hard to describe–every parent has his or her ideas about what makes a doctor the best one for their baby.
One of the most important things to look for is someone who is easy to talk to who can explain things to you in clear, easy-to-understand terms.
Have a list of questions that are important to you as new parents; you may have to interview more than one doctor to find the best fit for your family.
Some questions you might consider asking include the following.
• What are your qualifications and training?
• What is your availability?
• Are your office hours compatible with our schedules?
• Do you have weekend or evening office hours for well-baby care?
• If we only need medical advice, is there someone we can call and talk with in your office?
• Can a sick child be seen the same day?
• How can we reach you in case of an emergency or after office hours?
• Who responds if you are not available?
• Do you have a website or email address?
• Do you or your nurse return phone calls the same day?
• Do you have X-ray facilities and a laboratory at your office? If not, where would we need to go to have tests done?
• Do you explain diagnostic procedures, medications and test results so that we can understand them?
• Are you interested in preventive, developmental and behavioral issues?
• Does your practice participate with our insurance?
• Do you have a staff person to file our insurance claims for us?
• What is the nearest (to our home) emergency room or urgent-care center we would use?
• What happens in special medical situations? To whom do you make referrals?
Commitment: What are some safety tips that you can share with new mothers now preparing their baby's nursery?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: Some safety tips for the nursery include the following.
• Always put baby down on his or her back when sleeping or resting. This position has been proved to reduce the incidence of SIDS.
• Bars on a crib should be no farther apart than 2-3/8 inches. If you can pass a soft-drink can through the bars, they’re too far apart.
• Mattress should fit snugly–you shouldn’t be able to fit more than two fingers between the side of the crib and the mattress.
• Railings should be 26 inches higher than the lowest level of mattress support and at least 4 inches above the mattress at its highest level.
• Use only fitted sheets–they should wrap at least 2 inches under the mattress on all sides.
• Use a cornstarch-based powder that is fragrance-free.
• Use lead-free paint on walls and baby furniture.
• Don’t put anything in the crib except baby–no bumper pads, pillows, blankets or toys. Wait until baby is able to turn over from front to back and back to front before you put anything else in the crib.
• Baby should never sleep in the same bed with parents–no bed sharing!
Commitment: What are trouble signs that a new baby might be sick and a doctor needs to be called immediately?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: Until baby reaches 12 weeks old, anything out of the ordinary can qualify as a possible emergency, even if you might consider them minor in an older child. That’s because baby’s immune system has not matured yet and cannot fight infection.
Be alert to the following signs and symptoms, and call your baby’s doctor if he or she:
• has difficulty feeding
• has a bruise or bump on the head
• has difficulty breathing–if he or she sucks ribs in when breathing or if lips look blue
• vomits after most feedings, especially if vomit is brown or green, or is ejected with force (projectile vomiting)
• if you see mucus or blood in the stools or if baby has diarrhea after each feeding
• if baby doesn’t have a bowel movement during the first week
• has a fever of 100.6F or higher, measured rectally
• appears yellow; it could be jaundice
• looks and/or acts differently, such as extreme lethargy or sleepiness, is highly irritable or is very pale
• sleeps longer than 6 hours, is hard to wake up and skips more than three feedings
• repetitive movements that don’t stop when you hold baby
• if the soft spot remains sunken for longer than a few minutes, it may be a sign of severe dehydration, especially if accompanied by fever, vomiting and/or diarrhea–take your baby to the hospital immediately!
Commitment: What challenges do parents often face the first week or two when
they bring their new baby home? What advice do you have on coping with
these new challenges?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: The biggest challenge new parents face is relaxing with their new baby. It is often difficult not to get too concerned about how to take care of a new baby. By not getting overly uptight and trying different things with baby, parents will soon learn what works for them and baby.
Commitment: What do you often see are the biggest mistakes new parents make that
first month they bring their baby home? How can these mistakes be
avoided?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: Some of the mistakes we’ve seen include being afraid that picking up and comforting a baby will spoil him or her, not letting baby sleep enough (wanting to show baby off to friends and family), leaving baby in a car seat or infant seat too long (take baby out as soon as you get where you’re going), dressing baby too warmly or keeping the heat in the house too high.
Parents can read our books, which may help them relax about what is OK and what is not. Again, they should trust their own instincts with their baby.
Commitment: Taking a new baby out can be a challenge. What tips and advice do
you have for a new Mom who is preparing to venture out with her newborn
for the first time?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: A parent may want to take a newborn out on errands or for short visits. However, many experts recommend that you don’t expose baby to large groups or take him or her out in public for the first 6 weeks, except to go to the doctor. This is especially true during the winter, when baby may be exposed to more viruses because cold conditions keep homes, offices and businesses closed up more.
It’s OK to take baby to a doctor’s checkup; ask to sit in the well-child waiting room.
When you do take baby out, dress him or her for the weather—usually only one layer more than you in cold weather, the same number of layers in warm weather. Keep outings short. You’ll be surprised how quickly both of you will tire or how soon he or she will get hungry.
Commitment: What advice do you have for a mother who may have had a difficult
birth and found bonding with her baby is difficult, and she is not
feeling the intense love and excitement she expected to feel? What can help the bonding process?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: After any birth, a woman may not feel an immediate attachment to her baby. That’s OK–it happens. Some women are afraid that if they don’t bond with their baby in the delivery room, it will never happen. That’s a fallacy.
The quality of the relationship between a mom and her baby isn’t governed by what happens immediately after birth.
Bonding is a process that happens over a period of time. In fact, a parent will bond with his or her child, in one way or another, throughout the child’s entire life.
Attachment to your baby is an ongoing process. The interaction between parent and child is what establishes the bond. Bonding in the delivery room is wonderful and helps both parents connect with baby, but don’t worry if delivery complications delay this experience for you. The process can begin hours, or even days, after birth, and it will continue for a long time.
The daily care you give your baby as parents strengthens the bond between you. Bonding is a growing process—it doesn’t happen immediately—and it deepens over time.
Commitment: What can help soothe and comfort a cranky, colicky baby who doesn't stop crying for hours?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: No one method for dealing with crying is foolproof or will work with every baby. Parents need to try many different things to deal with their baby’s crying.
Some proven methods include the following. Try them and see what works for your baby.
• Use repetitive rocking motions, such as swaying, rocking in a chair or just sitting down and rocking back and forth.
• Let baby suck—whether on a pacifier, his or her fist, your finger, the breast.
• Stroke and massage baby.
• Carry baby in a sling or front carrier.
• Bathe baby in warm water.
• Hold baby close against your chest to hear your heartbeat.
• Take baby for a ride in the stroller or the car.
• Sing to baby.
• Swaddle baby snugly.
• Experiment with ways to calm baby, such as rubbing the tummy, blowing on toes, humming softly in his or her ear.
• Massage may help. One technique to try is to hold baby’s foot with one hand. Use the thumb pad of the other hand to press gently and firmly on the sole of baby’s foot for a couple of seconds, then release. If this helps calm baby, continue pressing and releasing the foot for a little longer, then repeat with the other foot.
Commitment: As an ob/gyn who has delivered thousands of babies, what do you wish
you could tell the new parents after delivery that would help them that
first year?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: Below are some suggestions for new parents to help them through the first year of baby’s life.
Trust your instincts–You may be a first-time parent who has never been around newborns before. Lots of people will probably give you advice. However, you deal with your baby every day.
Babies cry–Your baby is going to cry; it’s natural and expected. A newborn may cry as much as 3 hours a day, or more. It’s your baby’s only way of communicating with you. It may take a little while for you to connect with baby is this way, but you soon will. Call your pediatrician if you are concerned.
Spitting up is normal– Babies spit up. In a newborn, the muscle that closes the opening to the stomach may be underdeveloped. This allows breast milk or formula to come back up. Baby really isn’t spitting up a lot, no matter how it looks. Burp during a feeding. Hold or sit baby upright after a feeding for a little bit. This helps keep the food down. Call your pediatrician if baby vomits a lot.
Baby will have some rashes–Most babies have a rash or rashes during their first few weeks of life. Baby acne, milia, cradle cap, bumps and pimples are common. These rashes occur because the mother’s estrogen is still circulating through baby’s body. Rashes soon disappear, so you don’t need to do anything about them.
Baby coughs and sneezes–Your baby will cough and sneeze to clear nasal passages of mucus, dust and other irritants. It’s probably not a sign of illness. Don’t be concerned unless baby also has a fever or is congested and coughs or sneezes interfere with eating and/or sleeping. If this occurs, call your pediatrician.
Baby poops–You may wonder what a normal bowel movement looks like for your baby. What’s normal for one baby may not be normal for another baby. It all depends on what your baby eats and how her body processes food. If you bottlefeed your baby, he or she may have bowel movements two or three times a day. Stools may have the consistency of soft ice cream and be brownish in color. As the weeks pass, baby may have fewer bowel movements as the system matures. If you breastfeed baby, stools may be loose, yellow and mustardlike. There may be a bowel movement after every feeding. Some breastfed babies pass stools much less often. It’s not unusual for them to go 1 or 2 days, or as long as 4 days, without a bowel movement, then have a huge one.
When baby’s normal bowel routine changes, it could be a sign that she has a problem.
Fevers–Any fever during the first month of baby’s life is extremely serious because infections can advance quickly in a young baby. Baby’s immune system is immature, and it may not be able to fight infections very well. Call your doctor immediately.
Commitment: What are the do's and don'ts of caring for a baby with a fever?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: You can try some treatments at home to help reduce baby’s fever. The following measures are often used with babies.
• Encourage baby’s fluid intake.
• Provide baby with plenty of rest.
• Don’t dress baby too warmly.
• Don’t rub baby down with alcohol to lower a fever. When you do, you cause baby to shiver as the alcohol evaporates, which produces more heat.
• Give him acetaminophen for babies, if he or she seems uncomfortable. Be very careful not to exceed the recommended dosage. Follow directions and measurements carefully.
• Pay special attention to other symptoms your baby may have.
When to Call the Doctor
It’s hard not to panic a little when baby has a fever. You are probably very concerned as to what’s causing it. If your baby is only 1 or 2 weeks old, call your pediatrician immediately. He or she will probably want to see baby. Call your doctor if the following situations occur.
• Baby is less than 3 months old, and his or her temperature is higher than 101F.
• Fever is 104F or higher in an older baby.
• Baby is crying inconsolably and cannot be settled.
• He or she is lethargic or difficult to wake.
• He or she has breathing difficulties.
• He or she seems to be suffering from abdominal pain.
• He or she has a sore throat and/or difficulty swallowing.
• He or she looks or acts very ill.
• He or she shows no signs of improvement after you give acetaminophen.
• He or she has had a fever for more than 72 hours.
• He or she was better, but the fever returned.
• He or she seems to be having ear pain.
• He or she has difficulty or pain when urinating.
• He or she has a febrile seizure.
Commitment: What should every parent have in their diaper bag that will make life easier?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: A diaper bag is an essential for just about every parent. Be sure your bag is well stocked. You may want to include the following:
• clean diapers
• baby wipes
• diaper-rash ointment
• a tube of petroleum jelly
• a changing pad
• a burp cloth
• extra clothes
• a light blanket
• a couple of pacifiers, if baby uses one
• If you bottlefeed, include formula and bottles for longer outings. You don’t have to worry about these if you breastfeed, but you may want to include some extra breast pads for you.
Commitment: Finally, what are your best ten tips for a parent who wants
to give their very best to their new baby and help their baby reach
their emotional, intellectual and physical potential that first year of
life?
Dr. Curtis and Ms. Schuler: The 10 best things parents can do for their child include the following.
1. Play with baby.
2. Talk to baby.
3. Interact in as many ways as possible with baby.
4. Both parents should be involved with baby in play and care.
5. In the first 6 months of life, you can’t spoil a baby by picking up and caring for him or her when baby cries. Always meet baby’s needs.
6. Keep the house safe for baby–childproof it in as many ways as possible.
7. Don’t smoke around baby, and don’t let others smoke around him or her, either.
8. Keep all well-baby appointments, and be sure your child is immunized. It protects your baby and helps protect all other babies who cannot receive immunizations.
9. Always put baby down to sleep or rest on his or her back.
10. Don’t worry if your baby isn’t reaching milestones at the same time as other babies of the same age. Your baby is an individual and will do things at his or her own pace. Relax and enjoy it!
To Purchase "Your Baby's First Year: Week by Week" click here.
About the Authors: Glade B. Curtis, M.D., M.P.H., an obstetrician/ gynecologist, is board-certified by the American College of Obstetricians, and is the father of five. He lives in Utah.
Judith Schuler, M.S., has co-authored books with Dr. Curtis for more than twenty years. Ms. Schuler divides her time between homes in Wyoming and Arizona.
