How To Be A Hepburn in a Hilton World: The Art of Living With Style, Class, and Grace
Author Jordan Christy Discusses Her Thoughts On How To Live With Poise and Style In A World Dominated By "Thongs, Scandals and Bad Behavior."
Commitment: What is your book, How to Be A Hepburn in a Hilton World about? Why were you motivated to write about this subject?
Jordan Christy: The book is a guide to living with intelligence, poise, and style in a world that is dominated by the opposite: thongs, scandals, and bad behavior! I was motivated to write about the subject by my own experience with the "stupid girls" in junior high - I always wondered why smart, classy girls were the minority. Celebrities began making headline news every day with this same bad behavior, and by the time I reached my 20's, I realized I wasn't alone in my confusion as to why stupid girls were supplanting smart girls news on a daily basis.
Commitment: You write of a new type of 'It Girl' explaining,"...just because we're surrounded by BlackBerrys, miniskirts, and The Real World doesn't mean we can't take some of those graceful, sophisticated, old-fashioned values and implement them in our everyday, modern-girl lives." What and who is the new type of 'It Girl' and how is she different from the Paris Hiltons/Lindsay Lohans and Britney Spears of our modern age?
Jordan: A classy It Girl is easy to spot - rather than stumbling out of bars at 3am, she's walking across the stage to receive her college degree. Instead of sporting the shortest skirt and teeniest tank, she's dressed in flattering, stylish pieces of clothing that cover all controversial body parts.
Rather than shopping her way to success, she's pursuing her goals and aspirations with integrity. Reese Witherspoon is a great example of this new type of It Girl. She's well-spoken, talented, and always looks amazing. She's immersed in a world that highlights girl drama and short skirts, but she always takes the high road and acts with intelligence and class.
Commitment: If a woman came to you and said, 'I would like to be this new kind of 'It Girl' what advice would you give her and what steps could she take to become this type of woman?
Jordan: What a great question! I would first recommend taking a look at your closet, because you never get a second chance at a first impression. Rid yourself of all trashy tops and tiny skirts, and hit the mall for some adorable, stylish and modest pieces.
Second, respond to each situation with intelligence and class. Life is going to throw you all kinds of curve balls every day, but it's how you handle those situations that sets you apart from the crowd. Third, strive to achieve your goals with smarts and elbow grease. Don't compromise your morals and values just to get ahead in life. I'm a firm believer that there is no substitute for good, old-fashioned hard work!
Commitment: What do you think women of the past, like Audrey Hepburn, possessed that women today are lacking? What are your thoughts on the role models young women have nowadays?
Jordan: Many great women of the past - like Audrey - possessed talent, intelligence and poise. In today's get-famous-quick reality world, those traits and qualities are no longer necessities. Respectable role models seem to be few and far between these days, but there are still several for young girls to look up to.
For tweens, Selena Gomez is a classy, non-sex-tape-leaking Disney darling that seems to have her head on straight. For high-schoolers, Taylor Swift is a great role model and proof that hard-work and integrity really can get you somewhere in life. For young women in their 20's, Rachel McAdams is a talented, classy, non-partying role model to admire.
Commitment: You wrote, "The polite manners, proper etiquette, and refined language that our great-grandmothers were raised on could be a much-needed splash of cold water on today's dumbed-down reality world." What are some of the manners, etiquette and refined language that you would like to see return as part of our culture?
Jordan: In the speech department, we need to begin by eliminating the bulk of "like's." It's especially hard to fix when we're surrounded by peers and TV shows that thrive on "like" in conversation, but it's definitely possible to pare them down. In the manners department, a simple "please" and "thank you" will go a long way. These are rarities in today's society, and you'll stand out when you approach people with polite, kind requests, and on the flip side, sincere appreciation and gratitude.
Commitment: You wrote, "if we want to begin cultivating a culture of class, style and grace, we'll have to stop focusing on the Stupid Girl captions and start making our own Smart Girl headlines." Okay, then, what are Stupid Girl captions, and what are Smart Girl headlines and how do we make them?
Jordan: It's easy to spot the Stupid Girl headlines - they are everywhere! Whether it be the latest Sunset Strip scandal, or a reality star getting yet another breast implant, Stupid Girl headlines seem to dominate the daily news. Smart Girl headlines look like Anne Hathaway saying that she doesn't drink or do drugs, or Selena Gomez saying that she doesn't engage in girl drama; it looks like a girl getting accepted to her dream college or a woman finding a cure for a disease. We can make smart girl headlines everyday with simple, intelligent steps forward.
Commitment: What are three ways a woman can become a Hepburn in a Hilton world? Can you share with us your best tips for following in the footsteps of a graceful, stylish woman of class?
Jordan:
1. Set your standards high. Whether it's with the boys you date, the jobs you accept, or the friends you surround yourself with, you need to have high expectations for yourself, above
everything else.
2. Dress with class. Your style should attract quality people - people that will give you the respect and attention you really want and deserve.
3. Speak intelligently. Become informed about the world around you - read a newspaper, pick up a great book, or surround yourself with older, wiser mentors. This will help eliminate "stupid girl" speech from your vocabulary!
Commitment: What do you think is behind the culture of women who "crash their BMW's in Hollywood, excessively use the word like, and drape themselves all over the nearest male." What are the reasons that our culture is turning out so many women who lack self-respect and who sell their self-esteem for some free publicity?
Jordan: A lot of it has to do with parenting, I believe. When we raise girls to expect a Lexus for their 16th birthday, it becomes difficult to concurrently teach values, gratitude and self-worth.
If girls don't know how much value they inherently possess just by being a female (i.e., they're not defined by the clothes they wear, the boy they're with, etc.), it's easy for them to chuck that self-worth at the nearest reality TV crew. We need to make self-respect and self-worth a priority again!
Commitment: You wrote that it takes "guts and smarts to go beyond the status quo." Can you explain this? What are some ways young women can go beyond the status quo?
Jordan: Not much is expected of young girls these days; it would be extremely easy to fall in line with the "stupid girl" behavior and not give a second thought to goals, class and self-respect.
It takes intelligence, confidence and self-assuredness to blaze a new trail and avoid the siren call of the clubs! You might feel alone at first, but stay the course! You'll be so glad you did.
Commitment: What fashion advice do you have for women who want to be Hepburns, instead of Hiltons?
Jordan: Be the classiest, most stylish version of yourself. You certainly don't need to don heels and pearls every day to be a Hepburn, but you can look cute and trendy, while still covering all necessary body parts.
For example...are you looking for a stylish, yet Hepburn-approved first date outfit? Pair a fun Anthropologie skirt with a cute set of flats. Top it off with a casual blouse and you'll be set to go. Need a Hepburn-approved outfit for a night out with the girls? Slip on some dark denim jeans, a cute pair of kitten heels, and an end-of-summer J.Crew top.
This way, you never need to worry about falling into a subway grate and exposing your girl parts to the world!
Commitment: Do you have some advice for mothers who are raising daughters, and who dream of their daughters becoming women of style, grace and class? What did your own mother teach you that has helped you grow up to be a woman with self-respect?
Jordan: Great questions! I’m a new mom myself, and I’ve realized that mothers have such an incredible opportunity to impart knowledge and wisdom to their daughters - it's a relationship that is like no other. As a mom, you have the opportunity to let your daughter know that she is loved, beautiful, and of priceless worth. You have the chance to let her know that she doesn't need a guy to define who she is. You have the ability to speak purpose and identity into her life.
My own mother always told me I could do anything that I set my mind to. She always told me that she was proud of me just for who I was, and consequently, I never looked for a guy to complete me, or a job to define me. She also always encouraged me to never compromise my standards, and respond to situations with intelligence and integrity. My mom is the reason that I am who I am today!
Commitment: What are your best two tips for those who are looking for a great guy, and do not want to stoop to acting desperate in a bid for attention?
Jordan:
1. Put away your phone! We make ourselves way too accessible these days through texting, emailing, MySpacing, etc. Guys want something they can pursue, and it's hard for them to do that when we're throwing ourselves at them.
2. Know where to look. Rarely will the great love of your life - Mr. Darcy if you will - be hanging out at the local club, getting trashed and dancing it up with other lady folk. Hang out at spots where nice guys gather - the library, coffee shops, community gatherings, etc.
Commitment: In the chapter "Words, Words, Words" you discuss the steps toward becoming a "more intelligent, well-spoken lady." Can you share some of these steps with us?
Jordan: Absolutely! The best and easiest way to begin speaking more intelligently is to turn off the TV. Instead of your usual hour of The Hills, play Scrabble, read a book, or learn a new language. Being intelligent doesn't have to be painful!
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About the Author: Jordan Christy is a publicist for Warner Bros. Records and has worked with dozens of artists and celebrities, in addition to TV and various media outlets. She has written for local and national fashion magazines and music trade publications. She lives in Nashville, TN with her husband Drew.
